So I know it's been... forever, and time is still not on my side, but as Wynne's 1st birthday looms, I think of nothing but her so I decided to take a break from not working today and do a blog post... try to catch up since in the blog world, she's still only what... 2 months old?!
So at this point it's hard to remember the highlights or lowlights of what was going through my head at that point. Although I'm sure they had a lot to do with struggles of breastfeeding, and going back to work.
Going back to work restored (or in her case created) order into both of our lives, so I was never all that upset about it. I took a picture of her coming home from the very first day of daycare:
I had been so worried about car rides, being by myself driving with a potentially screaming infant in the backseat. Could I survive it?? Would she survive it?! Well, I lucked out with a great car baby. I love going on car rides with her and I think she likes it too.
I still can never shake the fear that at any minute she'll start screaming and be completely inconsolable, but I think that's just my biggest parenting insecurity; her being super upset/me not being able to make her feel better/me being unable to accept that she will be just fine.
Incidentally, it's one of the only areas of disagreement between Kyle and me as well 1) I pick her up because she's fussy, 2) he sighs angrily because he feels like I'm coddling her, 3) I get upset because I feel like it makes me a bad mom being overly solicitous towards her, 4) he gets upset because he wasn't calling me a bad mom. Vicious but harmless circle, thankfully we're solidly on the same page on almost everything else.
Switching gears entirely, because that's enough of that, Kyle took the "sleep when the baby sleeps" mentality very much to heart in the beginning:
Seriously, the rest are just me talking in an annoying sing-songy voice at her until she gets distracted by the TV or the camera or starts crying.
But next up, Wynne's little personality starts to shine through, we laugh when she laughs, and she starts doing stuff other than just sitting or laying around!!